A Word On Our Daily Prayers For Autism’s Belonging in the Body of Christ

Those who are praying along with our daily intentions this Lent will notice that each day’s prayer examines an aspect of neurodiversity which many may not have considered. We are seeking to shift the stereotyped sense of autism as problematic symptoms and misbehavior toward a deeper realization that autistic expressions are very human, very functional ways people respond and attempt to cope when our processing system is flooded. Most people know what it’s like to feel overloaded. The difference is, autistic people’s processing systems reach capacity at a higher frequency, and overload when we are asked to keep pushing. Our bodies absorb every bit of data from our surroundings at once, filling all available processing slots quickly to capacity without the benefit of extra time to sort it all out. As with the famous chocolate factory scene from “I Love Lucy”, we do what we can to keep up, but pretending we are fine only makes things worse. Unless that conveyor belt slows down or we get the support we need to finish, we know how this is going to end. Except – for autistic people – we’re not laughing. More like, it is devastating, each and every time. It is exhausting. It is humiliating to have to ask for help, all the time… and, it’s even more so when we are met with those who think the way to help us is to shape our behavior for us. “Try harder! You can do it if you really apply yourself!” – No. We can’t.

But here’s what we want to convey: Any person’s capacity to participate in anything – including social activities, learning environments, and worship services – requires the ability to process information and engage with others. When our sensory systems are bombarded with more input than we can process, autistic or not, our bodies shift from relaxed participation to high alert.  If we do not take time and space to catch up with what we are already processing, our fight/flight/freeze reflexes start acting like circuit breakers, systematically shutting down extraneous processes (such as social graces, small talk, and creative thinking) as a last-ditch effort to keep our processing afloat. Most of us can recall a time when we felt frazzled by too many people speaking at once or too many demands coming in at the same time. If someone approaches us right then with a bit of unrelated conversation or unsolicited advice, we can well imagine what our response might look like… and, most neurotypical people would make plenty of allowance for why this is reasonable. Why, then, is it unreasonable when autistic people experience this (which we do)? Hint: It’s not unreasonable. It just happens more frequently, and more intensely, because our loads are constantly full, and traditionally, people have been told to “help” us by making us struggle. These prayers are intended, in part, to show the other side of this.

The crucial point to remember: Neurodivergent minds are flooded with simultaneous processing tasks, all the time. The way we look, sound, act, and cope, is a reflection of how well – or not – we are able to keep up with those processes at any given moment.

Corollary: The degree of assistance, patience, and accommodations we receive from others around us helps determine the ease with which we can participate and engage with others.

Autistic people deal with this all day, every day. It is not something that can be trained out of us. We can’t be cajoled into doing better. We look and act the way we do because we are at capacity, all the time, even when other people are not.

Why do we take such deliberate care in phrasing our intentions? In hopes of helping the wider Church see that autistic traits are not moral failings, and are not conquerable with the right attitude. Autistic traits are expressions of the same Body of Christ in which we are all members. Our experiences are more intense, and our capacities are reached sooner and more frequently than neurotypical members. The point to remember is that our needs are the same human needs as the rest of the Body – not subhuman needs, as original models of autism would lead us to believe, and not willfully lazy, self-absorbed, oppositional, or anti-social.

The extra time, extra space, extra patience, and gentler environments which autistic people utterly need to participate in ordinary things of life are arguably conditions which benefit anyone. Who among us does not feel a bit of relief when someone shows us empathy and helps us out when we are struggling? Which then begs the question: why are so many people so reluctant to allow these things? Why is slowing down, making things easier, and softening the sensory environment seen as “giving in” instead of giving the Body an oasis of desperately needed neurological rest, where all of us – including and especially autistic people –  can heal?

 

Lord, Hear Our Prayer!

Neurodivergent hospitality is not a contradiction

by Aimée O’Connell

One of the things we strive to do at Autism Consecrated is look at the many contradictory aspects of neurodivergent life in the hopes of finding solutions.  Universal design is a core value of ours, at times as much for the sport of the challenge as for the gratifying payoff each time the entire community can benefit from something which might instead have gone the way of an easily forgotten one-and-done accommodation.

The topic of hospitality is an ongoing conversation here.  What does hospitality look like for autistic and neurodivergent people?  Well, that’s not too difficult to answer, in theory.  Hospitality means “the friendly and generous reception of guests, visitors or strangers” (Oxford Dictionary).  Implied in that is a sense of genuine interest in providing a comfortable, safe, inviting setting for those who stop by.  Hospitality for the neurodivergent, then, is no more mystifying than finding out what our needs are, and then striving to provide for them.

Still, that can seem daunting to communities who are used to doing things as they have always been done, and who approach accommodations with a certain trepidation, consciously or not.  Besides that are the apparent contradictions between social ministries and autistic needs.  For instance: What does “fellowship” look like for those with low social energy, or in group settings that cannot provide the level of quiet and space some people need to communicate (that is, to process and participate in conversation)?  Any attempt to answer will be very setting-specific.  But here is a constant across all situations: connection is possible with as few as just two people.  Saint Thorlak often drew the attention of his mentees to what Jesus said in Matthew 18:20 (“Where two or more are gathered in my name, I AM present”).  Jesus is both present in the Sacrament of the Eucharist and in the community of His followers, whom he explicitly says comprise His Body.  In Matthew 18:20, He clarifies that community exists in groups as small as two – thus offering a way toward solving the question of hospitality for autistic and neurodivergent people.  Warmth, invitation, welcome and support can be offered individually to individuals at any place, any time, and community is achieved – that is to say, the Body of Christ is realized.

Saint Thorlak himself was mentored by the Victorine brothers in Paris, renowned for their credo Docere Verbo Et Exemplo – To Teach By Word And Example.  He had the reputation of being a stickler for the priests in his diocese to live what they preached, demonstrating discipline by themselves being well-disciplined, and demonstrating mercy by themselves being merciful.  He was also known to have great difficulty speaking, particularly in large groups (… sound familiar?) Much of his “teaching by word” was accomplished through writing, which was then read by and to clergy as pastoral instruction.  Saint Thorlak used writing to both accommodate his needs and conserve his social and physical energy for the Sacraments and important administrative matters.

Our pondering has led us to see Saint Thorlak’s method of teaching by word – both his frequent reference to Matthew 18:20, and his embracing his communication needs so fully – as his way of “teaching us by example.”  We constantly look for ways to model what we might like to see take shape in terms of universal design and outreach, all the while considering our needs as autistic people, and the needs of any autistic people in ministry and socially-active roles in church life.  It only makes sense to start with the same kinds of accommodations and supports as befit our own sensory and processing needs.  And so, we are going to try rolling out a beta version of one of our ideas.

Saint Thorlak’s Virtual Café is a simple page front offering images suggesting (we hope!) an inviting spot for website visitors to pause and connect, virtually.  If this were in three dimensions, we might picture a small café with comfortable seating, low lighting, a selection of refreshments which both please the palate and consider a variety of dietary needs… and, cats.  We happen to find cats most delightful and spirit-lifting.  If this were in three dimensions, we’d have to have cats, along with a cat-free room for those who find cats distressing or are allergic to cat dander.  (Anything is possible when we build cafés in our imaginations… the virtual model at least offers allergy-free images).  Over time, the cat theme may evolve into something more artfully nuanced; for now, the beta version has plain old snapshots of two feline denizens.

The café of our imagining would offer space to connect with one another, one or two at a time.  We’re not just proprietors here – we want to greet you, share time together and connect with you ourselves.  Your visit brings Christ present, and we are eager to welcome Him!  We genuinely seek the gift of your friendship.

Since this is a virtual café, we thought we might welcome visitors with a contact form.  We realize that has its limitations, particularly for those with low vision or difficulty typing.  It’s a beta version, after all, and our resources are extremely simple.  However, we hope that the technology on our visitors’ end can be of help to them.  Speech-to-text might work for those who need it, and perhaps down the road we can rig up a way to record spoken messages and send them through.  As for us, we rely heavily on typing, so that is a reflection of our own communication and processing styles.  We are happy to receive feedback and ideas if anyone has any to share.

So, what is the point of the form?  Anything our visitors want to say, share or ask.  Over the next few weeks, as Lent begins, we thought we might offer the specific idea of folks sharing their triumphs and frustrations with their Lenten journeys, since that (especially the latter) seems to be a common theme among fellow neurodiverse travelers.  Look for a blog post on that topic in the very near future.  But really, any topic you find relevant is of sufficient interest.

Please click through and give it a go!  May Saint Thorlak’s Virtual Café bless us with an autism-friendly realization of fellowship in the Body of Christ!

 

To Recognize and Value the Autistic Members of the Body of Christ

by Aimée O’Connell

The shift from Mission of Saint Thorlak to Autism Consecrated may seem to have come quickly from the front-end point of view.  However, the people behind the websites have felt the need for changes for some time now.  Adopting a new name and look reflects far more than simply rebranding or moving to a permanent webhost.

“We” – that is, myself, Father Mark Nolette and the people who regularly engage with us – are acutely and personally aware of the need for a better discussion of the theology of autism.  Where does autism fit into God’s plan?  Where do autistic people fit into God’s plan?  It’s not that the questions need asking… these questions have been asked about autism and every other disabling condition for decades, if not centuries, in some form.  It’s more the fact that the answers have remained the same, and are just as unsatisfactory, starting with the conceptualization of “disability” itself.  When a person approaches the community, the wider Body of Christ, with a condition that requires particular accommodations to facilitate their engagement and participation, we can just as easily say the community is “handicapped” [definition: “having a circumstance that makes progress or success difficult”] as many still call people with needful circumstances.

It is usually not helpful to debate if autism is a disability because autistic people find that our success often hinges on the amount of support and understanding we receive from those around us.  Difficult tasks are not as challenging when others recognize and adapt to our needs, and simple tasks seem impossible when we are held to the standards of images we do not fit.

Where, when, why, how does this discussion enter our parish lives?  Our communities?  Our dioceses?   As we prayed about how to fulfill our call as “missionaries” of the themes we promoted on the former website, it became clear that the need goes all the way down to the very foundation of our faith as Christians.  We cannot support one another without first asking How is autism experienced in the Body of Christ?   The answer tends to vary quite widely.  Some communities are living, thriving models of such natural inclusion that it is evident their identity rests in Christ Himself, as described by St. Paul.  Other communities are not there yet, for numerous reasons which deserve exploration without presuming the worst conclusions.

People of all ages and walks of life have a habit of forgetting that God creates life from love and fulfills in perfection.  Humans, by comparison, make objects.  It is appropriate to evaluate these objects, and even the materials from which they are made, in terms of purpose, utility and quality.  God has no need of such assessment.  From perfection comes perfection; therefore, all that God creates is useful and purposeful by the mere fact that God is God.  We do well to keep that in mind when considering the value of including, understanding, inviting and adapting to the needs of one another, as individuals and as communities.  Exclusion arises when we slip into seeing one another in terms of what we can do, how well we function, or where we fit in… instead of recalling that we all bear the same value as children of God by virtue of our personhood.  People are not objects.  We do not have utility.  Perhaps we have skills and ideas which can be judged as useful or superfluous, but in terms of our membership in any community, we have all been endowed with inherent value by God.

Autism does not exist independent of those who bear the traits qualifying them for that description. Autism only exists in the context of a common humanity: the autistic persons + how they are valued by the community. Click to Tweet
And so, we come together as Autism Consecrated, to recognize and value the autistic members of the Body of Christ.