Neurologically Sustainable Discipleship

The Lenten resolutions previously posted here center around understanding and honoring our physical, neurological needs – and recognizing that ignoring and pushing through these needs is not only detrimental to our mental and physical health, but also to our relationships to others, and our relationship with God. The human body is designed to shut down processes of social engagement and higher thinking when in survival mode, and survival mode gets triggered when our sensory, cognitive and emotional processing is overwhelmed. If Lent is a season for identifying what impedes our relationship with God, then it is appropriate for neurodivergent Christians to seek ways to live sustainably within our neurological means, and to recognize the spiritual cost of habitually exceeding our limits. Lenten “sacrifice” for us may mean giving up trying to push through or stay silent about our needs for the sake of not making waves.

When we care for our sensory needs and treat ourselves with compassion rather than pushing ourselves beyond our capacities, we not only maintain our own health, but we set an example of compassion for others to follow.  This runs counter to many slogans and messages dominating popular culture.  How many times, for example, do we hear some variation on “no pain, no gain”, or the theme that growth only happens when we leave our comfort zones?  This might be true in athletic and military training, but for autistic people, pain is a signal we are obligated to heed rather than ignore. Pushing past our limits leads to meltdown, burnout, and sometimes, literal injury. With many neurodivergent people also experiencing joint hypermobility, migraine headaches and heat sensitivity, to name just a few, pushing through pain is an actual risk and liability. It is just as important to learn how to explain our limits with grace and humility as it is to be active, and to know how to plan ahead so that we can give our best to whatever we expect to do.

Autism Consecrated is designed to be a living example of how autistic people can sustainably engage in ministry and discipleship [which is to say, neurologically sustainable for our autistic needs]. We integrate the accommodations and flexibility we need into all that we do, taking into account the ways we comfortably communicate and receive and respond to information. For instance, our auditory processing gets easily overwhelmed with phone and video calls, so we communicate exclusively through email and text. Seeing words in type and having unpressured time to reflect helps us effectively respond to questions and comments we receive. Large gatherings overwhelm our sensory processing, so we limit our outreach to one person at a time. It is a natural outflow of our respective vocations as a priest-hermit and Lay Carmelite to offer our time in prayer for specific intentions brought to us, and in general, for better understanding and belonging of autistic people in the Church; in this, we also pace ourselves according to our energy levels and processing loads, simultaneously finding sensory refuge in the spaces we have devoted to prayer.

(Read more about how this apostolate is influenced by the Carmelite charism here.)

Going further, we have intentionally designed Autism Consecrated to operate with as few resources as possible. We are 100% volunteer, and we rely on word of mouth and the Holy Spirit rather than investing our energy and money in marketing and promotions. We are not about numbers. We don’t get anywhere near as much attention as larger, incorporated ministries do, but that leaves us more energy to be fully present to those who reach out to us, and to maintain our commitment to intercessory prayer.

Finally, we strive to promote belonging for autistic people of all ages, not just children. There are thousands of autistic teens and adults who are spiritually hungry and need accommodations, but the majority of resources out there are geared toward autistic children and are rooted more in behavior management than spiritual development. We want autistic teens and adults to know they too are seen, heard, valued, and that their spiritual needs are of equal importance.

Being able to offer God’s love to even one spiritually hungry person, and being in a position to pray for autism’s belonging in the Body of Christ, is more than sufficient to fulfill our mission day after day. We pray our example may show autistic people of all ages that neurodivergent discipleship is very possible.

 

Autism As Mission

We have written previously that autistic people are less likely to attend Mass than non-autistic people (e.g., our 2023 post, “Raise Your Hand If You’re Not Here”).

Our Daily Prayer for Autism’s Belonging for the Second Wednesday of Lent reads like this: “We pray for our autistic members who are not able to participate in Church liturgies and activities. May our autistic members be genuinely missed when absent. May we prayerfully consider what the barriers might be to their participation, and what the community can do to help address and relieve those.”

Which barriers might come to mind?

  • Sensory load
  • Health (both mental and physical)
  • Energy level (vs. exhaustion)
  • Quality of sleep (vs. chronic sleep deficit)
  • Executive functioning
  • Access to transportation

While each of these is relevant, if we are to be completely honest, we need to go further and acknowledge that – consciously or not – the community’s attitude toward neurodiversity is often the biggest and most difficult barrier. People may say outwardly that they welcome and encourage people of all abilities to come to Mass, but there remains a deep interior skepticism that autism is anything more than pop psychology’s attempt to stylize laziness and apathy toward decorum. These attitudes are not only grossly incorrect, but also do nothing to build up the Body of Christ. If anything, autistic members are isolated and wounded by this barrier more than all the others combined.

Ask any autistic person: If we were able to overcome such barriers as these through our own efforts and willpower, we would do so. Trying harder is not enough – and not within our grasp. Telling ourselves not to feel [exhausted, overwhelmed, anxious] is as useless as telling our cars to keep going when the fuel gauge reads “empty.” Our capacities and limits are what they are, and pushing past them is harmful, period. Those who encourage us to do so are operating on faulty, outdated, and disproven information.

Some have become so accustomed to the idea that merit is earned by acting well that they confuse patience and compassion for “special treatment.” But accommodations for autistic people are no more indulgent (or optional) than the “special treatment” shown by, say, bandaging and resting a sprained ankle… or by using supplemental oxygen when scuba diving.

Autistic people really do want to be present and participate. If we can’t remove the barriers for ourselves, what can we do?

Trust that we serve God best as our authentic selves, needs and all.

Diverting our energy from trying to live past our means starts by trusting God’s wisdom. Our capacities and limitations were designed, with purpose, by Our Creator. Trust that God intends some members of the Body of Christ to process at a different pace, to be deeply affected by what we see and hear and taste and ponder, and, yes, to need patience and assistance from others as a result of our body’s design. Trust that God calls even those of us whom the world writes off to be disciples. Believe that the fruit of this discipleship is cultivated in part by the extra time, extra space and extra understanding which will allow us to be present and contribute.

It requires this same trust to ask and expect the community to help us in our needs, and that is how offering our autism – by just being our authentic selves –  becomes mission work, even when that  mission brings us to confront the situations which  find us:

– misunderstood, unseen, or unheard by our community

– unaccommodated, despite repeated asking

– unable to participate, especially when large groups are our only option

– asking more questions than people would like

– overwhelmed and dysregulated, even when we are doing the best we can

In other words, the mission of being autistic includes challenging the way our communities respond to differences and disabilities, and living in such a way as to break the stereotypes perpetuating the misunderstanding and isolation which keep us from fully realizing our vocations as disciples.  When we focus on suppressing and hiding our autistic traits, we miss out (and so does the entire community) on what happens when we put that energy instead into being who God made us to be – which St. Catherine of Siena says will set the world ablaze with God’s grace!

Lord, let us be a sign by which stereotypes can be challenged. May our communities appreciate why we wear ear defenders and tinted glasses to Mass, and why we might sit in a separate place with additional sensory supports.  May our fellow parishioners experience God’s grace when lowering the lights, reducing the volume, and providing space which helps autistic people engage much more fully in worship. May our autistic discipleship be a source of grace and blessing to our communities.

Lord: Hear our prayer!

 

A Word On Our Daily Prayers For Autism’s Belonging in the Body of Christ

Those who are praying along with our daily intentions this Lent will notice that each day’s prayer examines an aspect of neurodiversity which many may not have considered. We are seeking to shift the stereotyped sense of autism as problematic symptoms and misbehavior toward a deeper realization that autistic expressions are very human, very functional ways people respond and attempt to cope when our processing system is flooded. Most people know what it’s like to feel overloaded. The difference is, autistic people’s processing systems reach capacity at a higher frequency, and overload when we are asked to keep pushing. Our bodies absorb every bit of data from our surroundings at once, filling all available processing slots quickly to capacity without the benefit of extra time to sort it all out. As with the famous chocolate factory scene from “I Love Lucy”, we do what we can to keep up, but pretending we are fine only makes things worse. Unless that conveyor belt slows down or we get the support we need to finish, we know how this is going to end. Except – for autistic people – we’re not laughing. More like, it is devastating, each and every time. It is exhausting. It is humiliating to have to ask for help, all the time… and, it’s even more so when we are met with those who think the way to help us is to shape our behavior for us. “Try harder! You can do it if you really apply yourself!” – No. We can’t.

But here’s what we want to convey: Any person’s capacity to participate in anything – including social activities, learning environments, and worship services – requires the ability to process information and engage with others. When our sensory systems are bombarded with more input than we can process, autistic or not, our bodies shift from relaxed participation to high alert.  If we do not take time and space to catch up with what we are already processing, our fight/flight/freeze reflexes start acting like circuit breakers, systematically shutting down extraneous processes (such as social graces, small talk, and creative thinking) as a last-ditch effort to keep our processing afloat. Most of us can recall a time when we felt frazzled by too many people speaking at once or too many demands coming in at the same time. If someone approaches us right then with a bit of unrelated conversation or unsolicited advice, we can well imagine what our response might look like… and, most neurotypical people would make plenty of allowance for why this is reasonable. Why, then, is it unreasonable when autistic people experience this (which we do)? Hint: It’s not unreasonable. It just happens more frequently, and more intensely, because our loads are constantly full, and traditionally, people have been told to “help” us by making us struggle. These prayers are intended, in part, to show the other side of this.

The crucial point to remember: Neurodivergent minds are flooded with simultaneous processing tasks, all the time. The way we look, sound, act, and cope, is a reflection of how well – or not – we are able to keep up with those processes at any given moment.

Corollary: The degree of assistance, patience, and accommodations we receive from others around us helps determine the ease with which we can participate and engage with others.

Autistic people deal with this all day, every day. It is not something that can be trained out of us. We can’t be cajoled into doing better. We look and act the way we do because we are at capacity, all the time, even when other people are not.

Why do we take such deliberate care in phrasing our intentions? In hopes of helping the wider Church see that autistic traits are not moral failings, and are not conquerable with the right attitude. Autistic traits are expressions of the same Body of Christ in which we are all members. Our experiences are more intense, and our capacities are reached sooner and more frequently than neurotypical members. The point to remember is that our needs are the same human needs as the rest of the Body – not subhuman needs, as original models of autism would lead us to believe, and not willfully lazy, self-absorbed, oppositional, or anti-social.

The extra time, extra space, extra patience, and gentler environments which autistic people utterly need to participate in ordinary things of life are arguably conditions which benefit anyone. Who among us does not feel a bit of relief when someone shows us empathy and helps us out when we are struggling? Which then begs the question: why are so many people so reluctant to allow these things? Why is slowing down, making things easier, and softening the sensory environment seen as “giving in” instead of giving the Body an oasis of desperately needed neurological rest, where all of us – including and especially autistic people –  can heal?

 

Lord, Hear Our Prayer!

Lenten Resolutions

by Aimée O’Connell

 

With the season of Lent just up ahead, I would like to offer Autism Consecrated’s take on Lenten resolutions. Boiled down, these would be something like this:

  • Learn about my neurobiological infrastructure
  • Live within my neurobiological means
  • Patiently, politely, cheerfully refuse* to exceed those means
  • Consecrate my neurodivergence to God, offering Him all that I am, that I may bear witness to autism’s belonging in the Body of Christ

(* This phrase, “cheerfully refuse,” is a direct nod to the title used by Leif Enger in his 2024 novel. That wording captures how I strive to face confrontation when trying to be faithful to my needs, and I express my sincere gratitude for his giving the world that phrase.)

Awhile back, I was asked in an interview what advice I might give to autistic individuals and families who are seeking to strengthen their connections to God and their faith communities. My response from then fits very well with the way I recommend forming our Lenten resolutions.

First: Understand what autism is, and what it is not.  Learn about autism from neuroaffirming sources and from fellow autistic people. 

Second: Consider that the autistic neurotype is part of God’s design, and contemplate the intentionality of that being part of our lives.  How have the autistic aspects of our lives shaped us, and how have they shaped the people around us? 

Third: Consider consecrating our autism to God, that He may lead us to where we will be most fruitful, exactly as we are.

Fourth: Be forthright with our needs. The more comfortable we are with our limitations, the more others will become comfortable supporting them. It takes mutual, voluntary humility to admit when we don’t know what to do but are willing to support one another in figuring that out together. 

Fifth: Never forget that God loves us and knows our limitations. So long as we sincerely desire to grow ever closer to God, we cannot let Him down or disappoint Him simply because we are neurodivergent or are struggling to keep up with the obligations and demands on our processing. 

Sixth: Keep the conversation going as long as it takes for the people in our parishes to better understand and support its autistic members of all ages, not just children.  And: Remember that starting a “conversation” does not necessarily require speaking or depend on traditional communication. It was St. Francis who said we do well to preach the Gospel at all times, but use words only when necessary… and it was the one-person-at-a-time example of St. Thorlak, not his words, which comprised his legacy and led to his canonization. Being authentically and cheerfully who we are, autistic and all, is mission work to the rest of the Church.

Once again this year, Autism Consecrated is offering Daily Intentions for Autism’s Belonging in the Body of Christ as a season-long deep-dive into various aspects of neurodivergence, seeking in prayer to build better understanding of and support for neurodiversity in our parish communities. These daily reflections serve as a prayer for the Church, but can also be a means of learning more about our neurobiological infrastructure, in line with the Lenten resolutions suggested above. The Daily Prayers for Autism’s Belonging are free for individuals and groups (including parishes) to pray, print, download and share.

Likewise, The Scriptural Stations of the Cross for Autistic People by autistic Catholic priest Fr. Mark Nolette are based on his firsthand experiences and a desire to unite the gifts and challenges of neurodivergence to the suffering and redemption of Jesus. This devotion may be accessed directly on our website or downloaded in print and audio formats (English).

And then, the Prayer to Consecrate Autism is also on our website, free to access and download and pray for ourselves or on behalf of someone close to us.

Let us all pray that the upcoming season of Lent will be fruitful for all of us, in the ways we need that most.

 

 

 

 

 

The Better Part

by Aimée O’Connell, T.O.Carm.

 

In a previous post, I talked about how tricky it can be to recognize the signs of neurodivergent burnout, how long-term masking can contribute to impostor syndrome, and how these factors together create significant obstacles to our spiritual health. In my opinion, this is where the Church needs to focus attention when asking how to reach out to and support neurodivergent members. We need to ask: What can the Church do that isn’t already being done by service agencies, advocacy groups and autism professionals? How can the Church speak to the humanity of the people we want to reach?

In my opinion, we do well to be less concerned about “best practices” and more concerned with simply spending time with Christ before us. In terms of the story of Martha and Mary of Bethany, we can say there are more than enough Marthas in the world with programs and protocols that help us feel like we’re “doing something” for autistic people. Yet – burnout and impostor syndrome still persist, even within the Church. Maybe that’s because the world (and the Church) is lacking the necessary balance provided by the Marys, who lead with an intuitive, often impractical sense of hospitality instead of following the expedient but impersonal suggestions contained in the three-ring binders of the Marthas.

I say this while considering those things which most often contribute to burnout and impostor syndrome, such as:

  • Forcing our executive functioning to operate at a pace it is not designed for or equipped to handle
  • Rationing our accommodations and supports for “once in awhile” or “only when we struggle” – when our need for neurological support is at all times
  • Setting goals for ourselves based on neurotypical benchmarks and assumptions which our neurological infrastructure cannot sustain
  • Acting as though neurodivergent differences are a question of “mind over matter” and can be extinguished through positive thinking, behavioral conditioning, dying to self, and other such maxims
  • Embracing these maxims as good discipline without first asking who (or what) we are seeking to serve, or why
  • Quantifying our worth in worldly terms such as social capital or tangible contributions
  • Adhering to disproven assumptions about neurodivergence made by neurotypical people (which were never accurate, and have been greatly amended in recent academic and professional discussions)

Mary of Bethany may not have set out to subvert the tyranny of custom, but she certainly made that statement when she “wasted” so much of her time and expensive oil on Jesus. And yet, we do well not to confuse her behavior with fawning: Mary was neither making a spectacle of her devotion nor trying to gain favor with Jesus. In my estimation, she was simply acting on a deeply intuitive sense of hospitality, and doing a rather good job at that.

In Mary of Bethany, neurodivergent people might find someone who knows not to hurry us when we need extra time to get to the point.… who knows not to cajole or prod us on when we say we’ve reached our limit… who knows how to adjust plans because the opportunity to sit with Christ is more important than making him adhere to the activity agenda… who generously provides for our sensory comfort even in the face of scorn and ridicule and comments about enabling us, as she knows instinctively that our bodies engage and respond to human connection more easily when we are not overwhelmed by light, sound, texture, dampness, smell and temperature fluctuations.

We can guess that Mary of Bethany’s hospitality does not worry about scarcity, especially when the One who fed the five thousand on five loaves is really and truly present. And, if Jesus had some “special need” which required an extra “something” to relieve that distress during His stay, Mary would think it absurd to only make that available on a schedule (like, say, every third visit to Bethany, or once every three months, whether Jesus is in Bethany or not) … or to pretend not to notice His need because she didn’t want the apostles to feel left out… or to leave Jesus in His distress because He needs to learn to cope on His own.

Back to the actual story: What does Jesus say when Mary is called out for her foolishness, ignoring protocol, acting inexpediently, and encouraging wastefulness and indulgence?

“Mary has chosen the better part.”

Mary, it seems, is not blindly obedient to maxims. Mary’s Lord is the One she welcomes without hesitation – not the Lord of Normal, who demands conformity and measures transgressions in standard deviations.

How do people of faith address burnout and impostor syndrome? By asking ourselves which Lord we serve. By not prioritizing appearances and protocol over Christ, Who dwells within us and sits before us. By choosing the better part.

 

 

Icebergs on icebergs

Picking up where we left off…

Autism Consecrated is hoping to start specifically naming the underlying things which erode our spiritual health, in hopes that identifying them will help the wider church community better understand and support ND needs. This iceberg here is itself the tip of a bigger iceberg (perhaps an entire armada of them) where our faith is concerned. Things like examinations of conscience, teasing out morally neutral neurodivergent traits from what is consciously sinful (without getting tangled up in criticisms which do not account for our legitimate processing differences), prayer, fellowship, engagement with scripture, why we need sensory support EVERY WEEK and not just once every three months at a “special” service… and many more. So much has yet to be addressed by people in the Church to acknowledge the gaping holes in our spiritual formation and support. The Church needs to hear from autistic people about our experiences and struggles, and autistic people need to feel safe and heard in sharing them. Let us pray this will happen.

 

When diagnosis and treatment are not enough

by Aimée O’Connell, T.O.Carm., and Fr. Mark Nolette

 

Maybe you’ve sat with a doctor or therapist and gone over questionnaires. Maybe you’ve done your own research in books and online. Maybe it’s for your own needs, and maybe it’s for a loved one. But here you are, with the name of something concrete – Autism, ADHD, Anxiety, Depression, Bipolar, Borderline, OCD, or similar and related diagnoses – along with a list of best practices, a plan for therapy, maybe even a prescription. It is a relief to know what you’re dealing with, and to have an outline of how to deal with it.

 

Then, you’ve got your faith to get you through. You’ve got church, the sacraments, a support network of wonderful, caring people, and a wealth of spiritual reading and podcasts to encourage you. You might have a gratitude journal and some Scripture quotes at hand, and inspirational books by renowned authors who remind us that with God, all things are possible, and we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us.

 

So, why isn’t it working?

Why do we still feel empty?

 

Two possibilities: Burnout, and spiritual impostor syndrome.

 

“Burnout” here is not the idea that we need a vacation or that we’ve gone too long without having fun. “Burnout” here refers to neurological exhaustion, below the conscious level, which is not something we can manipulate with willpower or even completely prevent, if we are neurodivergent. Our bodily processing systems run 24/7, and anything we do that requires executive functioning (which is… everything) will add to the neurological processing load. Negotiating our sensory environments, both by having to filter out the excess stimuli imposed by our surroundings and by having to seek baseline stimuli in places we are forced to be still, contribute to that load. As our executive functioning begins to suffer, our capacity to be chipper and peaceful diminishes, and criticism from those around us increases. Burnout is whenever our load has been maxed out longer than we have been able to keep up. Basic neurological rest, a necessity for neurodivergent people, is portrayed as a luxury in the minds of most people, and not something we are typically allowed to do until after burnout begins.

 

In short: For neurodivergent people, depression and anxiety (and other mental health crises) are more often symptoms of burnout than standalone diagnoses.

 

To use an analogy, physical pain is often a symptom of something more complex at work. We can diagnose pain and treat it, and even take steps to prevent it, but if there is something beneath that pain – like, say, cancer – then treating the pain alone will not solve the problem, and our health will continue to deteriorate.

 

Here are some specific reasons why focusing only on depression, anxiety, and other mental health crises, is problematic when burnout is at play.

 

  • Most therapy techniques and self-help books on depression, anxiety and mental illness, including spiritual books, describe and employ behavioral approaches which require conscious control over our emotions and motivation – giving no thought to the health or capacity of our neurological infrastructure.

 

  • Any coaching, advice, therapy or self-help/spiritual book ought to account somewhere for the fact that moods, motivation and executive functioning depend on the health of our neurological infrastructure. Some do get there eventually, but usually it’s after a lot of focus on and unpacking surface symptoms, behaviors, and “attitudes.” Meanwhile, our neurological burnout continues unaddressed and depletes us (or adds to the deficit) even further.

 

  • Expecting anyone to feel gratitude, maintain motivation, or make resolutions when our neurological infrastructure is maxed out is unrealistic, a recipe for failure, and potentially harmful.

 

  • Neurological exhaustion is treatable with significant lifestyle adjustments and accommodations which need to be available at all times, not just until “things get better.”

 

To date, I know of no Catholic or any spiritual resources specifically addressing neurological exhaustion and burnout, or its effects on our spiritual lives. (Please, tell me if they are out there and I have missed them!) Which then leads to the next point: Spiritual impostor syndrome.

 

Neurodivergent people have very likely grown up being corrected and taught how to act in ways that are prescribed to and imposed on us, not spontaneous or authentic. We learn social scripts, and how to suppress big emotions, and how to behave well enough to be accepted by others. The cumulative effects of masking are just now beginning to be researched, and the impacts are dire. Human beings are not meant to follow scripts, nor are we meant to do things to earn other people’s approval – but this has been the thrust of most therapies and therapeutic techniques, even those best-intentioned, and it is what most people think of as “the right thing to do.”

 

A lifetime of masking our authenticity and working for other people’s approval takes a big spiritual toll. “Impostor” syndrome is what happens when scripts are “imposed” on us by people in charge. Their love or affirmation of us is entirely dependent on whether we follow their scripts. These scripts do not reflect our true needs, but nearly always reflect the “needs” of the people in charge to control and manipulate us. As a result, even when we follow the scripts and earn the approval of these people, we feel empty and hollow. We feel like impostors. If this was our experience as children, we are very likely to imagine God as also imposing scripts on us that have no relevance to who we really are and that His love and acceptance of us are wholly dependent on our following the scripts.  It’s what happens when the scripts become God.

 

How, then, do we take ourselves to prayer before God? Can we trust that we do not have to earn His love, too? Can we face God after we have unknowingly cooperated with our own shunning, cloaked in the idea that our neurological needs and expressions need correction (or that our traits are loathsome, bothersome, too much, not enough)? How can we forgive ourselves, and those whom we trusted?

 

How can we trust God?

 

Sometimes we might also need to ask –

 

Where has God been in all of this?

Why did God make me this way, only to let everyone tell me I’m defective?

Haven’t I suffered enough? Haven’t I already died to myself, over and over and over, ad nauseam?

If I am beautifully and wonderfully made, why am I still not good enough?

 

Any true “therapy” that deals with “impostor” syndrome begins with a fundamental sense of being loved by God that cannot be contained by or flow from any script. It is analogous to what happened to Saul of Tarsus on the road to Damascus. In the light of the love and grace of God, the scripts lose their power as their inadequacies become evident. The person who has been so touched by God will then need some time to rethink and reprocess his or her whole life in the light of the knowledge of being loved by a gracious God!

 

No spiritual resource on depression, anxiety, mental illness or even neurodivergence can be adequate by itself without looking squarely at these questions and entrusting the answers to God’s merciful love.

In the meantime…

Yes: We are loved by God.

Yes: We are beautifully and wonderfully made.

No: People may not have steered us in the right direction, as far as how we can thrive as neurodivergent people. That is only just beginning to come into the mainstream narrative. Good intentions are still good, but methods can also be re-examined and revised based on what we know better now.

 

No: Our moods or executive functioning capacities are not indicators of our spiritual skills, or our goodness as human beings, or our belovedness by God.

 

Yes: Gratitude journals are good things. But, No: They are not the hinge on which our mental health rests. When we are neurologically rested, we have the capacity to be grateful for many things. When we are neurologically exhausted, we need to focus first on restoring our neurological health, and then we can both think about and authentically feel gratitude. Imposing it on us, however it may be packaged, makes us… impostors.

 

To be continued.

 

 

Prayers for World Autism Day 2024

In recognition of World Autism Day 2024, we are pleased to offer a Short Form of our Prayer Petitions for Autism’s Belonging in the Body of Christ. The Short Form is, like the full list, free to download, print, copy and share for any use, individually or in groups, including adaptation for Prayers of the Faithful at daily or weekly Mass. Likewise, this post may also be shared freely, that people in communities far and wide may join with us in prayer!

Download Page for short form: https://autismconsecrated.com/prayers-for-autism-belonging-short-form/

Download Page for full list: https://autismconsecrated.com/autism-consecrated-prayer-intentions-any-dates-2/

The short form is as follows.

Prayers For Autism’s Belonging in the Body of Christ

Heavenly Father, we offer these prayers to You, that we may humbly recognize where we stand, and where we fall short, in supporting the autistic community. We ask You to give us the grace of healing and reconciliation where wounds and division exist.

May we:

  • Realize, and counteract, language and attitudes which stigmatize and pathologize autism
  • See autistic social, emotional, and cognitive processing as equal in dignity to neurotypical processing
  • Design our space such that autistic people are not expected to mask, suppress or replace neurodivergent traits
  • Grow in empathy toward the experiences of autistic individuals
  • Embrace a spirit of humility, repentance and curiosity as we acknowledge where we still lack understanding and comprehension of the autistic experience, including:
    • Communication (including non-spoken communication)
    • Sensory processing and overload
    • Emotional processing, alexithymia, and hyperempathy
    • Information processing and overload
    • Performance pressure, social rejection, and exclusion
    • Hidden co-occurring conditions such as dyspraxia, dysautonomia, joint hypermobility, migraine, food sensitivity
  • Appreciate the presence of autistic members of the community, realizing that it is not possible to know if someone is or is not autistic by assumption, and that autism is present in all age groups
  • Ponder how many neurodivergent people in our community cannot be present because of a lack of support, and how we can extend to them the chance to authentically belong
  • Strive to make our community accessible, welcoming, and accepting to neurodivergent people
  • See the obstacles which prevent or impede neurodivergent people from being present in our community
  • Invite neurodivergent people in our community to lead, rather than be led; teach, rather than be taught; explain things to us, rather than be told how things are
  • Promote a culture of neurodiversity
  • Look to autistic members of the community for guidance and suggestions on how to support and maintain accessibility and regular participation by neurodivergent individuals
  • Outwardly demonstrate how striving to make our community more accessible to autistic members benefits everyone

May we seek forgiveness for the times we have:

  • Perpetuated inaccurate and unhelpful stereotypes
  • Allowed fear and pride to limit our generosity, creativity, and hospitality
  • Cited scarcity of resources in upholding the status quo
  • Relied on numbers to justify or deny accommodations, rather than upholding the value of the individual
  • Made assumptions or decisions for autistic individuals without their input
  • Failed to believe an autistic person’s experience
  • Turned an autistic person away from our community for being autistic
  • Lectured an autistic person about the unsuitability or inconvenience of their needs
  • Failed to include, invite, or respond to autistic individuals in community activities
  • Passed over an autistic person for volunteer or leadership positions, for the sake of their autism
  • Cast autistic traits as character flaws
  • Allowed convenience, popular opinion, fear, or jealousy to influence how we respond to requests for accommodations and accessibility
  • Required autistic individuals to suppress, mask, or eliminate neurodivergent traits in order to participate or belong

We ask this all in Jesus’ Name: Lord, hear our prayer!

AMEN.

 

Thank you for praying with us!

Looking ahead: Easter into April

It is with deep gratitude that we acknowledge the worldwide and encouraging response to our Daily Lenten Prayer Petitions for autism’s belonging in the Body of Christ. We truly thank everyone who has joined us in prayer, and we assure you that you have been instrumental in stirring up grace and new life where it has been greatly needed.

With the Easter season ushering in April, we have the opportunity to take these prayers a step further. If Lent showed us a way through the spiritual desert many of us experience from a lack of understanding and support for our autistic needs, then we have a ready reference in hand to offer our communities during the month dedicated in most places to autism awareness, acceptance and affirmation. As such, we have taken our Lenten prayers and written them so as to be suitable for praying any time, any day, any week, any season. As individuals, we can pray them in sequence, cycling through with renewed resolution each time we begin the set again. As parishes, we might use them specifically during April as a meaningful way to mark Autism Month in the Prayers of the Faithful. As Church, we may reflect on each petition as a way to assess how we are doing, and what we need to do, to support and champion neurodiversity in the Body of Christ. In whatever way the Spirit moves us, may we use these prayers to the glory of God.

Autism Consecrated’s Prayer Intentions are free to download, print, share and use as individuals and groups. May God bless and renew each one of us this April, and beyond!

A Lenten Daily Prayer Calendar to Realize Autism’s Belonging in the Body of Christ

Jesus, Re-member Us!

Lent necessarily evokes a certain imagery of journey: a voluntary withdrawal to a place of self-scrutiny to shed habits acquired from the world’s false theology of power, utility, and convenience, followed by a going forth with new resolve and better understanding of God’s intended Way. We often refer to this as a pilgrimage to the desert, evoking the literal path taken by Our Lord (and Israel before him) dedicated to prayer, self-emptying and preparation for the mission ahead. Desert life is likewise well-suited to pilgrimage, in that there are few places of concealment. The bright, hot sun starkly exposes who we are and what we carry with us, including aspects of ourselves and our habits which we might prefer stay hidden in our interior shadows; yet we soon realize the necessity of letting go of superfluous cargo if we are to survive the journey. Likewise, the desert’s vast stretches of isolation provide an environment free of diversions which might delay our reckoning. And then, the scarcity of resources reminds us unambiguously of our utter dependence on God, as well as the needs and interdependence of every member of the Body – both literally in our our own physiology, and figuratively in our reliance on mutual support within our communities.

For many autistic people, we are already in the desert. We are isolated, hungry, thirsty, and out of range of communication. We send signals, we explain our needs, we offer our services – but we are not seen, heard, or understood. It very much feels like involuntary exile without a clear or valid reason.

This experience is not unique to autistic people; indeed, the Church itself knows what it feels like to be excluded and isolated from secular society. In similar fashion, the Church communicates the Gospel message in many ways, yet is often not heard or understood. Nobody would argue that the Church is neither valued by contemporary society nor has much influence on public policy or cultural mores. It would be fair to say that the Church today finds itself in a very similar place as regards the secular world as autistic people. Wouldn’t it seem, then, that the experience of autistic people – who are very familiar with this sort of desert living – might be a great asset, and a source of wisdom, to the Church as a whole?

Unfortunately, autistic people are not only exiles from the cult of normalcy at large in the world. We are equally marginalized within the Church, the Body of Christ, by leaders who routinely ascribe to and apply the same standards as those held by that same secular cult of normalcy. A glance through our previous blog posts bears this out all too abundantly. To be fair, there are numerous parishes and dioceses who do take an active interest in supporting neurodivergent needs, and for these, we are truly grateful. We are not suggesting that the landscape is completely barren or bleak. We are, however, painfully aware that there are still many wounds yet to be healed, and many members of the Body who remain in exile from parishes, dioceses and communities who do not see the need to respond. It is to these communities we especially extend this invitation: Join us, this Lent, in our desert. And, to those who are already supporting neurodivergent members in the Body of Christ, as well as all our neurodivergent members far and wide: please, strengthen the Body for this journey with your prayers, too!

The following calendar serves as a map for such a journey. Each Lenten Day offers a prayer petition for pilgrims to draw ever closer to those of us who wait in hope for recognition, for reconciliation, and for our gifts and presence to be found acceptable by the rest of the Body.

On the Cross, the Good Thief – himself an exile from the community – made this prayer: “Jesus, remember me when You come into Your Kingdom.” This Lent, we ask Jesus to re-member us… to restore the exiled parts of His Body with circulation and nourishment and belonging.

Jesus promises “where two or more gather in My Name, I am there among them.” Be assured that this prayer calendar is being prayed by us here at Autism Consecrated. Whoever joins us in our prayer is united with us in Christ, and becomes a vital part of naming – and healing – the unfortunate effects of indifference, misunderstanding and outdated approaches to neurodiversity.  May we pray together: JESUS, RE-MEMBER US!

– Aimée O’Connell, T.O.Carm., and Rev. Mark P. Nolette

Further reading

Waldock, K.E. and Sango, P.N. (2023): Autism, faith and churches: The research landscape and where we go next. Autism and Faith, Vol. 20, No. 1. Retrieved on 2/2/24 from https://ojs.st-andrews.ac.uk/index.php/TIS/article/view/2578/1982.

Autism Consecrated grants full permission to print, share, save, forward, and distribute this calendar among individuals, groups and parishes.

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Autism Consecrated grants full permission to print, share, save, forward, and distribute images of this calendar among individuals, groups and parishes.

2024 Lenten Prayers to Realize Autism’s Belonging in the Body of Christ 

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2024 Lenten Prayers to Realize Autism’s Belonging in the Body of Christ 

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