Autism Consecrated

Author: Autism Consecrated

  • A Cloud of Witnesses

    A Cloud of Witnesses

    by Fr. Mark P. Nolette

    Twentieth Sunday of Ordinary Time (C)

    Hebrews 12:1-4

     

    In this world we have our troubles
    Sometimes lonesome, sometimes blue,
    But the hope of life eternal
    Brightens all our hopes anew.

    (Chorus)

    I don’t want to get adjusted
    To this world, to this world,
    I’ve got a home that’s so much better,
    I want to go to sooner or later,
    I don’t want to get adjusted to this world!

    – From the song “I Don’t Want To Get Adjusted”, attributed to Sanford Massingale. This quote is from the version that the folk group The Weavers recorded and sang live in the early 1950’s.  Many recorded versions of this song exist today. 

    The terms “adjusted” and “well-adjusted” may be used less frequently now than they were a generation or two ago, but the meaning these terms express remains an ideal in psychology. One dictionary definition for “well-adjusted” is the following: “A well-adjusted person is reasonable and has good judgment. Their behavior is not difficult or strange”. Such a person is seen as socially acceptable and popular, a model for others to imitate.

    We might think that, in the more fragmented society we live in today, any talk about being well-adjusted may be less compelling than it was in the past. On the contrary, it is even more true now. Each fragment in our society has more stringent requirements for accepting someone as “well-adjusted”, and more severe penalties for non-conformity. This reflects both the desperate need that human beings have to belong to something beyond ourselves as individuals, and the basic fact about human behavior that the great French social scientist René Girard points out – human beings learn by imitation.  We imitate other people, especially those of the group(s) we identify with.  Even people who present themselves as non-conformists are imitating behaviors they learned from people they admire, and are “not conforming” in ways that are acceptable to our society or at least the group(s) in society they identify with.  Even in their nonconformity, they conform! Those who fail to meet such societal standards are labeled as evil or mentally ill – often both.  Such societal standards are determined by whoever happens to be atop the social ladder at any given time.

    Now there is nothing wrong, as a rule, with adopting the language, styles and customs of whatever society we belong to. There is nothing wrong, as a rule, with belonging to a political party or having differing opinions on various political issues. There is nothing wrong, as a rule,  with enjoying the good things that this world offers. The clear exception to this rule, for us who call ourselves Catholic Christians, is whenever anything is contrary to the truth that Our Lord has revealed to us through His Church.

    This is where things get interesting. Remember that people learn primarily by imitation. We live in a fragmented society that presents a variety of values and norms to us – some of which are compatible with Catholic faith, and others which are not. We imitate what is around us, often without giving it a second thought. We do not notice – or do not want to notice – the cognitive dissonance between that various ideas and beliefs that are swirling about in our heads.

    C.S. Lewis, in The Screwtape Letters, has Screwtape, the experienced tempter, explain this to his apprentice devil Wormwood.  Even though this was written nearly eight decades ago, it still hits home:

    Your man has been accustomed, ever since he was a boy, to have a dozen incompatible philosophies dancing about together inside his head. He doesn’t think of doctrines as primarily ‘true’ or ‘false’, but as ‘academic’ or ‘practical’, ‘outworn’ or ‘contemporary’, ‘conventional’ or ‘ruthless’. Jargon, not argument, is your best ally in keeping him from the Church. Don’t waste time trying to make him think that materialism is true! Make him think it is strong, or stark, or courageous—that it is the philosophy of the future. That’s the sort of thing he cares about.

    Why do we do this? For one thing, we don’t want to look bad. We want to have it both ways, as long as we can manage it. We don’t even want to think about the incompatible ideas swirling about in our brains. We want to be acceptable to the people whose opinion of us matters. We try to be Catholic and other things, all at once. However, as Christ reminded us, we cannot serve two masters, let alone three or more. We will always end up choosing one over the others when the going gets tough in any way.  The choices we make then tell us – and others – who our real master is, if we are honest enough with ourselves to get the message.

    Let me use publications, rather than people, as examples of what I am trying to get at. Some Catholic publications in this country have a politically progressive lean to them. Others have a politically conservative lean to them. As such, this need not be a problem. The problem arises when there is a conflict between what secular progressives or conservatives think and what the Church teaches. Some of these publications, to their credit, side with the Church. Other Catholic publications will almost always ignore or criticize the Catholic approach whenever it is at odds with the approach of their political leanings. You see who the real master is.

    I’ll use people as examples only in this sense. Our society offers us models of what a successful, well-adjusted person looks like. Sometimes, these models don’t agree with each other, let alone with the teachings of the Church in some areas. We learn by imitation.  Who do we imitate? What do we imitate?

    Friends, I offer for your consideration the second reading in this Sunday’s Mass, taken from the Letter to the Hebrews. A few comments on this letter may be useful before we move on. It was assumed by many that this Letter was written by Saint Paul. However, it does not begin the way Paul’s other letters begin “Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus…”, nor does it end with Paul’s usual signature and farewell. The author is not named. In fact, the Letter to the Hebrews reads more like a homily given by a pastor to a congregation he knows well, in an effort to encourage them in their trials to remain faithful to the Lord.

    Our reading, taken from the twelfth chapter of Hebrews, begins in this way:

    “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us rid ourselves of every burden and sin that clings to us and persevere in running the race that lies before us while keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus, the leader and perfecter of faith.”  

    The author of Hebrews – or the ancient homilist, if our theory is correct – wants his readers and listeners to imitate “so great a cloud of witnesses” and Jesus Himself.

    Who makes up this great cloud of witnesses? We discover this in the previous chapter of Hebrews, which last Sunday’s second reading was taken from. The reading focuses on Abraham, but the chapter as a whole speaks about a number of Old Testament witnesses, from Abel all the way to those who died in the persecutions described in the books of Maccabees. They are all presented as models of faith for Christians to follow.  What are we to notice in these models of faith? What should we learn from them? The author of Hebrews tells us:

    All these died in faith. They did not receive what had been promised but saw it and greeted it from afar and acknowledged themselves to be strangers and aliens on earth, for those who speak thus show that they are seeking a homeland. If they had been thinking of the land from which they had come, they would have had opportunity to return. But now they desire a better homeland, a heavenly one. Therefore, God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.

    Later in the chapter, our author/homilist has more to add:

    What more shall I say? I have not time to tell of Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, of David and Samuel and the prophets, who by faith conquered kingdoms, did what was righteous, obtained the promises; they closed the mouths of lions, put out raging fires, escaped the devouring sword; out of weakness they were made powerful, became strong in battle, and turned back foreign invaders. Women received back their dead through resurrection. Some were tortured and would not accept deliverance, in order to obtain a better resurrection. Others endured mockery, scourging, even chains and imprisonment. They were stoned, sawed in two, put to death at sword’s point; they went about in skins of sheep or goats, needy, afflicted, tormented. The world was not worthy of them. They wandered about in deserts and on mountains, in caves and in crevices in the earth. Yet all these, though approved because of their faith, did not receive what had been promised. God had foreseen something better for us, so that without us they should not be made perfect.

    What is most interesting to me in all this is that, although we see references to people who could be called successful in the world’s eyes, the focus is elsewhere. “They acknowledged themselves to be strangers and aliens on earth… they desire a better homeland, a heavenly one… some were tortured… endured mockery… wandered about in deserts.. in caves and crevices of the earth”. These are not people who were successful by the usual worldly standards. These are people who were willing to give up their homeland, their freedom, even their very lives, for a promise of God that would not be fulfilled in its entirety in their lifetimes on earth. These are people who might not seem to be “well-adjusted” by the definition of society as a whole. Yet, “God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them”.

    When the author of Hebrews turns to Jesus as an example for us to imitate, this is what we read:

    …while keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus, the leader and perfecter of faith. For the sake of the joy that lay before him he endured the cross, despising its shame, and has taken his seat at the right of the throne of God.Consider how he endured such opposition from sinners, in order that you may not grow weary and lose heart.

    Again, the focus is on imitating the way that Jesus perseveres and is faithful through opposition, suffering and death.  It is easy to persevere when all are on your side. When you have to make a choice and persevere by faith, then we need the encouragement of this cloud of witnesses and the grace and strength that come from Jesus Himself.

    From our perspective, many centuries later, we can add more people to this cloud of witnesses. We can point to the Apostles and others in the New Testament who gave witness to their faith. We can point to saints of every generation, from the martyrs who died in the Roman persecutions to recently canonized saints. Many of us have patron saints of our own whose lives inspire and challenge us.

    Now, this cloud of witnesses is not made up only of people who have died in years past. There are people, living among us now, who are also part of that cloud of witnesses. Their lives encourage and challenge us in the same way that the saints of long ago do. Who are these people who make up this living cloud of witnesses? We all know people who strike us as holy, as living examples of faith, hope and love, as living Beatitudes among us. Among these, I want to single out for your consideration a specific group of people within this cloud of witnesses. I am talking about autistic people as well as others who tend to be loners and outsiders.

    Autistic people often feel like “strangers and aliens on earth” who “desire a better homeland”. They do not strike most people as being “well-adjusted” in the usual sense. Others tend to see their social awkwardness as pathological, as something that needs help. Yes, there is some truth in this. However, that very social awkwardness serves as a reminder to everyone that we are all “strangers and aliens on earth” who “desire a better homeland”. Autistic people witness to everyone that this present world is not our ultimate home. If we are to be “well-adjusted”, it is not to this world but to the homeland that the Lord offers us, a homeland that we already perceive in faith. Autistic people, by their social aloofness, are a prophetic witness to everyone of all that the Letter to the Hebrews has to say.  Remember the old story of the canaries in the mines. Autistic people are simply more sensitive than most to the transitoriness of earthly life and the need for faith in the Lord who leads us to our permanent homeland.

    I want to point out one more line in what I quoted previously from Hebrews: “without us they should not be made perfect.” In the original context, this refers to how this cloud of witnesses from the Old Testament never saw the complete fulfillment of God’s promises in their earthly lives, but looked forward to its fulfillment in Jesus and in Christians.  How would it apply to my description of autistic people as important members of the living cloud of witnesses today?

    As I said previously, autistic people feel more than most that sense of being wanderers on Earth and looking forward to a better homeland. This is true for all Catholics, all Christians. However, part of our calling as Catholic Christians is to be, here and now, a sign of what that future homeland will look like. We do not have only the grace and the vocation to point forward to the New Jerusalem. people who see how we live as Catholic communities should see some sign of the New Jerusalem already here among us.  Autistic people, like all Catholics, seek that heavenly homeland. The Catholic community as a whole has a vocation to show autistic people concrete signs that the homeland they seek is already here, among us, as Catholics, by the grace of God.

    How can Catholic communities do this? They do this by reaching out to their autistic brothers and sisters. They get to know them, learn what their needs are, and seek to make Catholic communities homelands for their autistic brothers and sisters, as much as they possibly can. Autistic lives matter, too.  In this way, the grace of the Lord can grow on autistic people just as it does for all Catholics.  They can find their homeland, already present (even if imperfectly) in Catholic communities who welcome them, and can look forward in hope to the full attainment of this homeland in the Lord, beyond this present life.

    All these (lived and) died in faith. They did not receive what had been promised but saw it and greeted it from afar and acknowledged themselves to be strangers and aliens on earth,  for those who speak thus show that they are seeking a homeland. If they had been thinking of the land from which they had come, they would have had opportunity to return. But now they desire a better homeland, a heavenly one. Therefore, God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.

  • From The Anchorite: An Open Letter To My Beloved Church

    From The Anchorite: An Open Letter To My Beloved Church

    An Open Letter To My Beloved Church

    By Fr. Mark Nolette

     

    To all Catholics, and all people of good will: May grace and peace be yours from the Father, through the Son, in the unity of the Holy Spirit!

    I am an autistic Catholic priest.

    My unusual identity gives a particular twist to how I am called to live out my priesthood. In the ancient world, one of the images used to describe the priest was pontifex, Latin for bridge-buulder. We still use this term when we refer to the Pope as the Supreme Pontiff. The role of the priest was seen as building a bridge between divinity and humanity. Since Jesus Christ, by His Passion, Death, and Resurrection, reconciled us to the Father in the Spirit, He became known as the true High Priest, the ultimate bridge-builder between God and humanity.  All Catholic priests, from that time on, have been given a share in His work of bridge-building. Some exercise this in parish ministry. Others serve as hospital or prison chaplains. Still others dedicate themselves to specific groups of people who are in need of shepherds and bridge-builders.

    I had been in parish ministry until the effects of my autism and my growing sense of a calling to devote myself to a more contemplative form of priesthood led me to retire from parish ministry. However, my calling to build bridges remains. The Lord has shown me that an important part of my vocation now is to be a bridge-builder between the Lord, the Church, and autistic people. I seek to do this through this blog.  I seek to do this through the Autism Consecrated website. I seek to do this through a life devoted to prayer as a contemplative hermit in the Lord’s presence. It is in this role as bridge-builder that I address you now.

    Autism is considered to be a disabling condition. If you are diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder and meet certain criteria, you can qualify for Social Security Disability in the United States. As a nation and as a Church, we still struggle to make our churches and public spaces accessible to people with disabilities in general. Many of our churches may have wheelchair ramps. Some may have people who can interpret the words of the Mass in sign language for our deaf members. It’s the rare parish that offers more than this.

    What about the needs of autistic Catholics? Most of the books written (so far) on autism and Church have been written by Protestants.  Those written by Catholics are chiefly focused on how to adapt a faith formation curriculum for autistic children.  People forget that those children grow up! A few parishes have set up “sensory-friendly” rooms (anti-cry rooms, so to speak), separate from the main worship area. These rooms feature (ideally) softer lighting, lower audio volume, and a TV screen for watching Mass.  Having spent time in one, I can say that such rooms cut both ways. On the one hand, they are a positive help. On the other, people who use these rooms are easily forgotten by the parish community, even its leaders, because they are unseen. A few dioceses are trying “sensory-friendly Masses”. These are Masses in parish churches, in their usual worship space, which feature lower audio volume, softer lighting, and other tweaks. These Masses are a step in the right direction.

    The biggest challenge, however, isn’t about buildings or programs or even sensory input. It’s about attitude. Do you want us? Do you, my dear fellow Catholics, want us autistic Catholics as part of your faith communities? If the attitude is there, the rest will follow.

    This is an extremely important question. One recent survey has shown that over 80% of autistic Christians (Catholic, Protestant and Orthodox) do not attend services in their local churches. This is the highest percentage of non-attendance of any group with a disability that still leaves them capable of going to church. Slipping into my logical brain, I would assume that this statistic alone would make autistic Catholics (and other autistic people) a prime focus of the New Evangelization. I would assume that this would make autistic Catholics an ideal target for the New Apologetics that Bishop Robert Barron and his Word on Fire community speak about. The harvest is indeed rich. Where are the laborers?

    When I could see that I could no longer do parish ministry, I proposed to officials in my diocese that I could be a consultant or liaison for ministry to autistic people in my diocese. No one showed interest in this. Diocesan officials say that the local parishes should do something about this. Local parishes say that they lack the resources for this.

    That is not all. I regularly hear from autistic people who have tried to connect with their parishes and find that they are ignored, their needs minimized, and their behaviors (over which they may have little control) ridiculed or mocked – even by pastors and lay parish leaders. Many autistic Catholics end up feeling like they have to pastor themselves. Is this right? Is this what Christ had in mind for His Church?

    It doesn’t help that autism is seen by many as a “mental illness”. Even in 2022, when people see the term “mental illness”, they are much more likely to think of serial killers and mass shootings than the story of a group of Down’s Syndrome adults who had a foot race in a Paralympics.  The ones who took the lead then slowed down so that all the runners could cross the finish line together and win together.

    Let me be blunt. If we autistic people were all wealthy, parishes and dioceses would beat a path to our doors. If we were members of a favored group in our culture, some Church ministers would reach out to us, if only to score points with society as a whole. Far too often, Church leaders take their cues (even without realizing it) from the prevailing cultural standards and not from the Gospel. We matter only if the surrounding culture says that we matter.

    The Gospel has a different narrative to propose to us. Christ offers us the parable of the man who had a hundred sheep. One of them runs off. In first-century Palestine, anyone wealthy enough to have a hundred sheep could easily replace the missing one. Yet the shepherd leaves the ninety-nine in search of this one sheep that had no worldly value.

    Saint Paul gives us more guidance. The community he founded in Corinth was beginning to think highly of itself from a worldly point of view. They believed that they had “made it” in the world, and looked down on those (even of their own Christian community) who had no worldly status. Saint Paul reminded them, first of all, that most of them had little worldly status when they first embraced the faith. Moreover, they are now members of the Church, the Body of Christ, where all cultural values are inverted. Those who seem to be worthless in the culture’s eyes are all the more valued by Christ and should be all the more honored by all His disciples.  Every Catholic community, from then until now, shows its understanding of the Gospel by how they love those people who are deemed to be lowest in the society around them.

    Autistic people, at first glance, may not seem attractive or promising candidates for a Catholic community. We have trouble reaching out and expressing our feelings, even feelings of love. We may seem cold and uncaring to those who do not know us. We can move in odd, repetitive ways, make sounds unexpectedly, or have meltdowns in public. We wear headphones to church to protect us from the audio volume (which may be too loud even for you) and we are accused of disrespect as you assume we’re listening to music.

    If there is anything you can learn about us, let it be this. We are like you in many ways.  The things that bother you, bother us. Where we differ from you is not in kind, but in intensity. Imagine an equalizer. In some areas, our settings are like yours. In others, the settings are turned way up – or way down. Some of us are extremely sensitive to sounds, or colors, or certain smells or the feel of certain things. Some of us are very sensitive to inconsistencies and incongruities and cognitive dissonance. If you claim to believe one thing and live another, we see it immediately.  Given our lack of social skills, we might even say so.  This may not ingratiate us to you!

    Nevertheless, we have souls and hearts.  We are human beings. Christ died for us as He did for you. Our salvation is as important as yours.  The fact that we are human, like you, should be more than enough for you to reach out to us and work with us to help us become part of our Catholic communities as best we can.

    Now I’ll let you in on a little secret. We have a special gift that comes from being autistic. Think of the odd behaviors we may exhibit – the movements, the noises, the meltdowns, the anxieties. Some of these, at least, are in fact given to us for the community as a whole. How so, you ask?

    Think of the old story of how miners would bring caged canaries with them into the mines. The canaries were more sensitive to poisonous gases than the miners, so the gases affected the canaries first. When the miners saw this, they knew they had to leave that mine, and quickly.  In the same way, if an autistic person reacts very strongly to the sound volume, or to poor sound quality, this is a problem that will affect everyone eventually. Rather than blame the autistic person, look at the problem this person perceives. If an autistic teenager can’t deal with youth ministry as most parishes do it, maybe the problem is with the way youth ministry is done. I read about a teacher who decided, as an experiment, to change the way she ran her classroom to accommodate her two autistic students.  When she did so, she found that everyone did better, not only the autistic students.

    What the world deems foolish is often wisdom before God.

    There is much more I can say; much more I can offer in regard to all this.  If you want to pursue this, you’ll find some other posts in my blog and a lot of the material in Autism Consecrated to be most helpful.  Please remember: Christ died for us autistic people, too!

    May the Lord generously bless all of you, all that you do and all that you are!

    Father Mark

  • The Anchorite: Such a Deal!!! (Seventeenth Sunday in Ordinary Time – C)

    The Anchorite: Such a Deal!!! (Seventeenth Sunday in Ordinary Time – C)

    by Father Mark Nolette

    In last Sunday’s episode from The Adventures of Abraham, we found him sitting in the shade of a tree near his encampment as the day is growing hot.  He sees three men nearby, not coming to him but on a journey elsewhere. Abraham runs to the three men, practically begging them to give him the honor of allowing him to give them food and drink. Abraham knows well that a journey in the hot sun could be perilous.  They would need food and water to survive.  Abraham provides the nourishment.  His guests in turn, promise him that he and his wife Sarah, in spite of their advanced years, would have a son by this time next year.

    In this Sunday’s episode, two of the men move on.  The third, now revealed as the Lord, decides to tell Abraham the purpose of this journey.  The people of Sodom have been accused of serious sins.  The Lord means to find out if the accusations are true and then to pass judgment on Sodom.

    By this point in the story, we may be asking questions based on our Catholic doctrine about God.  If this is God, wouldn’t He already know about the evils committed in Sodom? Wouldn’t He know what He was going to do? What’s the purpose of His conversation with Abraham in the first place?  If we recall that God is beyond the boundaries of space and time, that raises still more questions for us.  How do we resolve this? Where do we find light to help us?

    This story of the Lord and Abraham is similar to many of Jesus’ parables in that  it’s the story as a whole that tells us something important about God and humanity.  The picture that emerges from the entire story is the focus.  All the details are brushstrokes that paint a multilayered portrait that repays our contemplative gaze.

    What can we see in this story?

    First, we have Abraham, the man of faith. He proved ready, at God’s invitation, to leave everything he knew to walk toward a future that was impossible by any human standard. Abraham, having emptied himself of nearly everything, was open to God in a profound way. God then takes Abraham into His own heart, His own confidence.  Abraham is invited to be a part of God’s own inner conversation, so to speak.  God is not offended when Abraham raises questions.  In fact God seems to want these questions.  In how Abraham responds, he shows himself to be a man after God’s own heart, a Beloved of God.  Abraham speaks what is already in the Heart of God.

    Then there is the conversation itself.  Abraham believes that God intends to destroy Sodom for its evils. Abraham objects that God should not treat the innocent and the guilty in the same way. “Lord”, he asks, “if there are fifty innocent people in Sodom, will you still destroy it?” The conversation goes on, until God affirms that if He finds even ten innocent people in Sodom, He will not destroy the city.

    This reminds us of Jesus’ parable of the weeds and the wheat.  In that parable, the landowner does not want the workers to uproot the weeds for fear that the wheat will also perish.  Both must grow together until the harvest. We can also recall Jesus’ journey to Jerusalem, and how a Samaritan village would not welcome Him because He was on His way to Jerusalem. Jesus’ disciples wanted to destroy the village for this, but Jesus rebuked them and moved on.

    The story in our Abraham saga, then, affirms that God will not destroy willy-nilly because of the sins of the people.  He will offer grace and mercy.  If only ten good people can be found in the city, God will spare it.  In the same way, God does not desire any one of us to perish, no matter what our sins may have been.  If He finds even a small amount of goodness, faith the size of a mustard seed, He will forgive and offer new life.

    God’s mercy is not the only part of the story.  There is also God’s justice.  As it happens, God does not find even ten innocent people in Sodom. For the sake of Abraham, God does rescue Lot and Lot’s family before destroying the city.  It is as though Sodom as a whole had rejected God completely.. Yet, it is unclear whether or not Lot is among the innocent or the guilty.  He resists the call to leave Sodom and has to be practically forced out.  His wife is too attached to Sodom and she perishes. Their daughters do not act in an exemplary way, either.  Yet God offered them one more chance.

    Let’s return to our story of God and Abraham one last time. God will spare the whole city for the sake of fifty, forty, or even only ten good people. Suppose that there were fifty, forty or even only ten good people in Sodom. They would not be following the example of the others. Their beliefs score poorly on all the Sodomese opinion polls. These few people would be looked down upon, despised, by their neighbors.  Nevertheless, the city’s survival depends on these few holy ones.

    Those of you who are autistic or who have some other disability may see yourselves here. You are too often ignored, even despised. Even churches organize their liturgies and their ministries with scarcely a thought to your needs, unless they are forced to do so.  You may have been told, in many ways, that you have little of value to offer.

    What if this city… this parish… this country… this world exists only because the Lord loves you so much that he will show mercy on all because of you?